A Replica of Jesus’ Marriage to His Bride-the Church

This is a great mystery. (I’m talking about Christ’s relationship to the church.) But every husband must love his wife as he loves himself, and wives should respect their husbands-Eph. 5:32-33 (GW).

The The word replica describes for example, an object on a smaller scale – closely resembling the original. The Christian marriage therefore, is simply an illustration of a deep secret which conveys Jesus’ relationship with His bride, the church. By the time Christ comes to take His bride home in order to consolidate His marriage, Illustrations will no longer be necessary. There will be a grand reception in heaven, called the marriage supper of the Lamb (Rev. 19:7).

LOVE, SUBMISSION and UNITY that characterize Jesus’ marriage are to be prominent also in a true marriage of husbands and wives in Christ.

‘UNITY’, is the synergy of love and submission which represents the effects of body functions. Ephesians 5:28 and 30 throw further light on this; “So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones.” Other things that typify a good marriage are: beauty (glory), prosperity, and victory over Satan, sin, sickness and poverty. All these are possible because of Christ’s love.

Mutual Partnership

The best legacy for success in marriage will never be achieved through one marriage partner’s effort alone. It’s a matter of mutual contribution from both husband and wife. No matter how enriched in wisdom a partner could be, he or she cannot bring their marriage to the limelight without the cooperation of the other. Both husband and wife aren’t too good not to have imperfect traits; but, with their determination to please God, success is sure. They must be totally committed to God and to one another in love! The beauty of success in marriage is seen when husbands and wives work

together – functioning in their kingdom roles, and also helping the other in his or her role, in order to glorify God. This doesn’t mean they are perfect, but have learned the act of working together in love, to help each other to stand. They seem to have a motto: ‘I win we both win; you lose, and I will do everything under the grace of God to help you to stand together with me to win again‘!

Ecclesiastes 4:9 says; “Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor.”

The seriousness of success in marriage is seen in the way husbands and wives who have agreed to live together as one, tenaciously handle their responsibilities. Both must be absolutely committed to making sure that their marriage succeeds.

THE HUSBAND AND HIS LOVE

23 For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. 25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her, 26 “that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, 27 that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. 28 So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church (Ephesians 5:23, 25-29).

There are two of the foremost areas a Christian husband should emulate Christ. Those areas are:

1. A True Lover, and
2. A Savior.

The first thing a Christian husband should do to reflect Christ (the way Christ loves the church), is for him to love his wife sacrificially. Now before anyone thinks that I am controversial about this, let me throw some light on this truth. Although God has always loved the world right from creation, the meaningful expression of His love couldn’t have been better felt and received until He demonstrated that love on the cross. Christ manifested His love to His bride-the church by sacrificing Himself on the cross. Christ loved us and sacrificed Himself. In marriage, God places a demand on husbands to love their wives in a sacrificial manner. Christ as a true lover gave Himself up on the cross as a sacrifice to become our Saviour.

The sacrifice He made Himself on the cross identified Him as a true Lover and Saviour. A Christian husband is to love his wife like Christ loved the church! That is how he is commanded to love his wife. How did Christ love the church-His bride? He “gave Himself for her.” So, a Christian husband must give up himself, by giving up the best of all his life for his wife. If it took the grace of God for Christ to die on the cross to prove His love to His church, it will take nothing less than God’s grace for husbands to love their wives too!

A Replica of Jesus

The word Saviour, carries within it a keyword safety or protection. Christ died for our sin and to deliver and protect us (the church) from Satan and evil. In a way, or should I say, in a smaller picture, the husband is like a saviour to his wife. What made Christ to be a true lover is agape. What made Him a Saviour is the cross the sacrifice He made of Himself. In like manner a Christian husband should imitate Christ. The cross is a symbol of divine love and forgiveness. A husband who loves His wife as Christ loved the church, must therefore be ready to sacrifice his life enough to keep his wife loved, safe and protected from evil men and satanic harassment. His wife’s comfort and safety should be the utmost priority in his life. The Christian husband, like a savior and lover, is to provide good leadership and also create an enabling environment for his wife to grow spiritually (sanctified), becoming more glorious and having her needs met. Verses, 26-29, hereby buttress these submissions.

It is a reassuring dividend for husbands therefore, to really love their wives the way Christ loved the church. Verse 28 says, “He that loveth his wife loveth himself.” I recall here, the first wedding I was privileged to conduct as a branch pastor, in 1999. My message was DO YOURSELF A FAVOUR, LOVE YOUR WIFE. This topical message was derived from this verse. In summary, a true Christian husband who would love his wife like Christ must:

1. Be willing to sacrifice everything he has for his wife;
2. Take his wife’s well-being as a matter of primary importance;
3. Help her to learn how to overcome her challenges;
4. Care for his wife, the way he nourishes his own body.

For all these to be fully accomplished, apostle Paul said to Husbands, live with your wives with understanding…” –1 Peter 3:7 GW. The word ‘understanding’ in this scripture comes with a lot of patience. It will take a lot of grace for many men to learn how to understand their wives who God says are like weaker vessels. To even make this tougher, this scripture reads, giving honour to the wife…” Many men fail to honour their wives, because they do not have the comprehension that their wives are coheirs with them of the grace of life. They may be weaker in physical strength, but not weaker in terms of moral or intellectual inferiority.

Husbands should live with their wives – treat them with love in such a way that they are protected, provided for and gloriously looking stronger and better than the weaknesses they seem to portray. A wife who has a husband who sacrifices his efforts for her comfort and success would be confident enough to submit to him. And because they are in partnership under the marriage covenant, he also gets the dividends of his love investment.

THE WIFE AND HER SUBMISSION

22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 24 Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. 33 let the wife see that she respects her husband –Eph. 5:22, 24-24, 33.

Just as Paul placed much emphasis on God’s commands for husbands to love their wives, so also to submit to their the women are charged husbands. Let us consider some of the scriptures that point to the matter of submission:

1. Eph. 5:22 -Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.
2. The Message Translation (Eph. 5:22) – Wives, understand and support your husbands in ways that show your support for Christ.
3. Eph. 5:24 (KJV) -Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.
4. Eph. 5:33 (KJV) … and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
5. Col. 3:18 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.
6. The Amplified Bible says, Wives, be subject (be submissive and adapt yourselves) to your own husbands as (a service) to the Lord-Eph. 5:22.

God sees a wife’s submission to her husband as an actual part of her obedience to Jesus Christ. Her submission to her husband “as to the Lord,” is meant to be her obedience to God – which clearly shows her love for Christ. God was the one who commanded her to love her husband. Her love for God is clearly seen in the way she respects her husband. Remember, that Jesus said, “If you love Me, keep My commandments” –John 14:15.

The Amplified Classic edition, beautifully throws more light to this divine assignment in Ephesians 5:33. It reads; “… let the wife see that she respects and reverences her husband (that she notices him, regards him, honors him, prefers him, venerates, and esteems him; and that she defers to him, praises him, and loves and admires him exceedingly.”

Her duty as a helper to her man is summarily carried out through her submission as a sign of respect to him.

If you are a woman, the first thing you should know when getting married is that if God created you as a helper, your husband needs your help. To put this in the right perspective, your husband needs God’s help through you. Your husband is not complete without needing that help – God’s help to fulfil his own assignment in your life, your children’s lives and for God. You are the perfect human help for him in that covenant relationship of marriage. You are no longer that independent single woman, but a help meet meant to cooperate with your husband; using your abilities to fill in parts of his own inabilities or gaps where he needs them most. One prominent example in the bible that one could use in explaining what it means for a woman to be a helper is found in Proverbs 31:10-31.

THE VIRTUOUS WOMAN

How the story of one woman in the Old Testament termed the “Virtuous Woman” could still convey a complete marriage lesson that every Christian couple should benefit from today, is quite amazing! One could say she was a business guru; but all the same she would bag an additional excellent award for both home and ministry affairs too! Her ministerial assistance to her husband in combination to her homely duties and business skills, made her husband to become a man of great repute among the council of elders. Let’s see the summary of this wonderful woman’s complete curriculum vitae.

1. Homely Support (Vs 15, and 21)

15 She also rises while it is yet night, And provides food for her household, And a portion for her maidservants. 21 She is not afraid of snow for her household, For all her household is clothed with scarlet. This fearfully and wonderfully made woman was so committed to the welfare of her household, that she rises earlier than everybody else and makes sure that all important household tasks are not neglected.

2. Matters Pertaining to Business Investments (Vs 14, 24)

14 She is like the merchant ships, She brings her food from afar. 16 She considers a field and buys it; From her earnings she plants a vineyard. 24 She makes linen garments and sells them, And supplies sashes for the merchants. This virtuous woman didn’t bury her skills and education. Her major drive was to help her husband financially; and so she became an investor – and balanced it with her home management. A godly woman should make use of her education and skills to help her husband when the need arises. She should seek for good opportunities for her to be productive.

3. Matters of Benevolence (Vs. 20, 26)

20 She extends her hand to the poor, And she stretches out her hands to the needy. 26 She opens her mouth with wisdom, And on her tongue is the law of kindness. This woman of noble character, a godly wife who understood that she was called to serve alongside her husband’s purpose or vision, deemed it extremely important to minister to the poor and to counsel those who need godly wisdom. Her words weren’t harsh to visitors and the needy. Nothing is so important as when couples are drawn together to serve the Lord. This makes her husband’s work a bit easy. Her being very busy didn’t distract her from helping her husband in offering help to the needy.

Her invaluable and impeccable attitude, brought the writer of Proverbs to the place of awe that made him to ask; “A virtuous woman …; an excellent wife, (A woman of nobility, … a woman of great worth) who can find?” It’s so intriguing to read that A CHRISTIAN WIFE OF NOBLE CHARACTER “DOES HER HUSBAND GOOD AND NOT EVIL ALL THE DAYS OF HER LIFE” (Pro. 31:12). Wow! This verse 12 seems to be the icing on the cake! Her determination to do her husband good all the days of her life, brings us to the fourth point…

4. Matters of Reputation (Vs. 23)

23 Her husband is known in the gates, when he sits among the elders of the land.

Gates here refers to where the elders take great decisions and conduct the businesses that pertain to the governance of the land. It is like a legislative block or parastatal where great minds work, for the progress of the community. The men who gather at these kind of gates, are never mere men -but men of timber and caliber who commanded and dictated the wisdom for the city’s direction-spiritually, economically and socially. These caliber of men are amongst whom this noble woman’s husband had gained no small reputation! Her antecedents aided her supportive husband in scoring a good reputation.

There’s just one thing we should know, which made it possible for this woman to attain this height of success as a virtuous wife. That is, the enabling environment – the unflinching support provided by her husband! I believe she blossomed beautifully and powerfully under her husband’s love. And both of them became mutual beneficiaries of it all. Imagine the kind of introduction both of them would give to their colleagues! O how one day, after the end of time, Jesus, the head and husband to His church with godly pride and deep satisfaction, will excitedly present to Himself His chaste bride (virgin) – the church. This is the working of His love and dealings with the church – which is presently on-going through His love and forbearing grace.

The mutual efforts of “two are (always) better than one.” Friends are meant to help each other to do better. I believe marriage holds the highest level of human relationships – best of friends. I love the way the Message translation explains a wife’s submission in terms of supporting her husband; “Wives, understand and support your husbands in ways that show your support for Christ–Eph. 5:22. Continue to the Your Husband is More than Your Boss.