1.0 What is Silence?
“What we cannot speak about we must pass over in silence.” (Ludwig Wittgenstein) It was St Thomas Aquinas who once asserted that ‘a small error at the beginning becomes a big one in the end It would therefore be wise at the beginning of this work to attempt a definition of the concept of silence. What then is silence?
According to the Online Etymology Dictionary, Silence could be defined as, “muteness, state of being silent,” from an old French word, silence, meaning “state of being silent; absence of sound,” from Latin silentium”a being silent,” from silens, the present participle of silere “be quiet or still.” On the surface, the word “silence” seems to refer merely to the absence of sound. For example, if students are talking too loudly during a lecture, the teacher might say: “Silence, please!” This would mean something like: “Please stop making those sounds!” However, the word “silence” normally suggests much more than this. There are some kinds of sounds that do not disturb our silence. Certain types of music, for example, can promote just the sort of deep, reflective awareness that the word “silence” is attempting to convey. For example, the popular song, “the Sound of Music,” by Richard Rodgers and the song by the American music duo Simon and Garfunkel, “The Sound of Silence” clearly imply that silence is not the absence of sound, but is itself a (paradoxical) kind of sound.
Noise, in contrast to silence, can be defined as “disturbing sound.” In this sense noise might not actually make any sound, as heard by our physical ears. A recalcitrant thought might function as noise, while the birds chirping away in a nearby tree might promote silence (in the well-disposed listener) even though they are making quite a loud sound. In the same way, the background music in a film makes lots of sound; yet it can actually promote a sense of silence in the film if used in the right way. But if the music distracts our attention from the action happening on the screen, then it begins to function more like noise.
Music can similarly enhance a conversation between friends; but if the same music is playing while one of them is trying to tune a guitar, it will probably function more like noise.
Such examples suggest that the type of silence that serves as the ultimate fulfilment of the philosophical and spiritual quest is an inner experience, not a scientifically measurable statement about the decibel level of the sound waves coming into a person’s ears.
Many spiritual masters and philosophers have acknowledged a role for silence as more than just the potentially-embarrassing space we must leave between our words in order for our speech to be understood. Ernest Hello used to say: “The more we have received in silence, the more we give in action.” Silence is the father of action. Carlyle wrote: “The man who does not seek advice from the invisible and from silence, will never produce anything worthwhile in the realm of the visible or of the spoken word.” Silence gives us a new outlook on everything.
We usually think of silence as keeping our tongues quiet at certain periods. Silence is that, of course, but it is a lot more. Human speech is not just made up of sound; it is sound shot through with meaning – not as if it just a body, but a body with a soul in it. Similarly silence is not just the dead absence of sound were a dead body; what counts is the spirit behind this physical silence. One could get into a sulk and talk to nobody for days; we do not count that as silence.
From all these, it follows that silence is not the quiet of death. It is more like the silence of the seed that has been sown in the ground and is now germinating. It is the incubation of life, it turns dying into living.
1.1 The Call to Silence
“Be still, and know that I am God” (Ps. 46:10).
Modern life seems to thrive on a fondness for noise, and by noise is meant not only the staccato barbarism of jazz, but also and principally the excessive desires for that which distracts -love of amusements, constant goings and comings, excitements and thrills, and movement for the mere sake of movement.
Our modern life has been summed up in three words: hurry, worry, and busy. All the modern conveniences and inventions have not made more time for thinking, for being quiet, or for worshiping. Everyone seems busy, in a hurry; speed is the most essential factor.
The love of noise and excitement in modern civilization is due in part to the fact that people are unhappy inside. Noise exteriorizes them, distracts them, and makes them forget their worries at least for a moment. I have met people who claim that they prefer to be in noisy places; that such places of razzmatazz excite them and make them forget their sorrows.
The trouble with silence may be that many people feel the need to fill the void of silence with needless chatter, with TV, with music, with noise of some kind. Silence can be disconcerting and can make people feel uncomfortable and alone, that is why the world is filled with televisions that have been left on when nobody is watching, for background noise.
But what could be the reason for this quest for noise?
Fulton Sheen answers this question by affirming that, “it is not due to any inherent love of that which is loud, for people generally prefer that which is soft and refined. Rather, the reason is to be found in the great desire on the part of human beings to do the impossible, namely, to escape from themselves. They do not like to be with themselves because their conscience reproves and carries on an unbearable repartee. They do not like to be quiet because the footstep of the Hound of Heaven, which can be heard in silence, cannot be heard in the din of excitement. They do not like to be silent because God’s voice is like a whisper and it cannot be heard in the tumult of the city streets. These are some of the reasons why the modern world loves noise, and they are all resolvable to this -noise drowns out God’s voice and stupefies conscience.”
One of the really great needs of our own day is silence. Everyone needs time to reflect and to meditate. In order to remedy this, what is needed is less amusing and more musing; a silence; a going apart into the desert of our souls to rest awhile; solitariness from men and aloneness with God. A quiet time permits the soul to be sensitive to the whispers of God; a rest from modern maxims and the excuses of new philosophies and the excitements which appeal to the body and disturb the soul. There should be privacy inspired by the example of Him Who, least of all mankind, needed preparation in silence for a life of activity, and yet had the greatest of the all; a tranquility inspired by Him Who in the midst of a busy life spent a whole night on a mountaintop in prayers.
Silent periods of prayer and meditation can do more than anything else to liberate and help us become more aware of ourselves and God’s love for us. Silence helps us to manage our spiritual and emotional storms of life. Only in silence can God mould us and form us according to His own taste. Philosophers like Marx Picard insist that silence is the mother of speech.
Picard says that language becomes emaciated if it loses its bond with silence. Picard also compares silence to a pregnant woman about to give birth. Silence is not static but generative in so far as it gives birth to true words. Silence protects speech, enabling us to communicate what is true and good. Silence prevents conversation from degenerating into idle chatter. Thomas Merton calls silence the mother of truth.” The fact still remains that we need some quality silence or solitude or quiet time to fuel any kind of in-depth spirituality. Merton speaks of the creative power and fruitfulness of silence: “Not only does silence give us a chance to understand ourselves better, to get a truer and more balanced perspective on our own lives in relation to the lives of others: silence makes a whole if we let it. Silence helps draw together the scattered and dissipated energies of a fragmented existence. It helps us to concentrate on a purpose that really corresponds not only to the deeper needs of our own being but to also God’s intentions for us”.”
It might also be added without any sense of digression that when the Apostles received the Holy Spirit it was behind closed doors, after they kept nine days of a silent novena awaiting the coming of the Holy Spirit, the heavenly wisdom. It is silence that gives depth to the words that we speak. Maurice Maeterlinck wrote: “Souls are weighed in silence as gold and silver are weighed in pure water. The words we speak have sense only because of the silence wherein they bathe.”
Silence is important to our growing, changing, technological and urban civilization. It is obvious that humanity is facing many problems, and will still have to face many more, and that these problems are deeply disturbing the souls of all men and women. We need silence more than anything in the world. Søren Kierkegaard once wrote, “If I could prescribe just one remedy for all the ills in the modern world, I would prescribe silence. For even if the word of God was proclaimed in the modern world, no one will hear it; there is too much noise. Therefore, create silence.
Modern man needs silence more than the hermits of old. If we are to witness to Christ in today’s marketplace, where there are constant demands on our whole person, we need silence. If we are to be always available, not only physically, but by empathy, sympathy, friendship, understanding and boundless caritas, we need silence. To be able to give joyous, unflagging hospitality, not only of house and food, but of mind, heart, body and soul, we need silence.
A quiet time (silence and solitude are appropriate synonyms) is an essential ingredient of a contemplative spirituality. We need some time without activity or words or people. We need these not to escape from activity or words or people, but to get our heads straight and our hearts beating to the proper rhythm so that we can work creatively, so that we can speak wisely, so that we can deal with people gently and compassionately.
There is a period of silence monks call “The Grand Silence”. It is the hours after their night prayer that lasts until the morning work period. During this time only the most urgent need to talk is acceptable and all monks attempt to be as quiet as possible in whatever they are doing. We should all strive to have a time of “Grand Silence” in our day. We need times of quiet and stillness for our well-being.
1.2 Use of Silence
The use of silence cannot be limited to a particular place or time, for silence is not dependent upon a place, but upon a state of mind. It is not based on where we are, but what we are thinking about. However, it is most useful at certain times in human activities. The following are some of the moments that silence can be useful.
1.2.1 The Use of Silence in Prayer
One of the good times to use silence is during prayer. Everyone needs some holy, sacred and prayerful silence in order to have a serious prayer life because it is a condition for interior reflection, which is fundamental and important in prayer. There is no need to stress the importance of silence and the part it plays in the spiritual life. It is elementary, the A.B.C. of any attempt towards a spiritual life.
True silence is not an absence of people or of noise around; it is an abyss opening up in the centre of the soul. Silence is necessary for prayer as air for the lungs and food for the body. Silence is a means by which we attain a profoundly deep union with God in prayer through prayerful meditation. When we keep away from external and internal noise or distractions and become still, we are able to unite ourselves with God and to see the true nature of our inner selves. The state of silence is a way of reaching another part of your mind that is not possible when going about your daily routine.
1.2.2 The Use of Silence during arguments.
One of the best ways to use the power of silence during an argument is to stay silent. The ego will be trying to force its way out of you to fight on with the argument but you are the controller, not the ego. When someone is shouting at you, in order to spark off an argument or
just picking on you, you can literally take all the power away from him/her and keep all your energy by simply looking at him/her and saying absolutely nothing. This is extremely difficult to do but very powerful. Silence can be some kind of a therapy. Sometimes it pays to be silent. The kind of silence recommended here is not the benumbing, pernicious or malicious kind of silence that can tug one’s sleeves but a fecund silence, like that of the mystics.
1.2.3 The Use of Silence in Gossip.
When there is a crowd of people in the workplace, there are gossips who speak about other people. The Irish call gossip, “Talking about the neighbour”. He who gossips about other people can also become an object of gossip. The thing with gossiping is that it is contagious. When we do not like someone and someone else starts speaking about that person we instinctively tend to voice our opinion against the person.
Make an effort, stop yourself from catching the virus of gossiping, and use the power of silence whenever it occurs. If you are a gossiper yourself and people around start to notice that you are ‘not your usual self, do not give an explanation, just leave, saying you have got work to do or whatever. Pretty soon you will be out of the gossiping loop. Thomas á Kempis would say, if you withdraw yourself from unnecessary talking and idle running about, from listening to gossip and rumours, you will find enough time that is suitable for holy meditation. Very many great saints avoided the company of men wherever possible and chose to serve God in retirement. “As often as I have been among men,” said the philosopher, “I have returned less a man.” (The Imitation of Christ, Book 2, Chapter 20). We often find this to be true especially when we take part in unnecessary and sometimes, bad conversations. No man is safe in speaking unless he loves to be silent. Speech could be wonderful and in fact, sometimes silver-coated, but silence is golden. Speech is human; silence is divine.
It was the great legend, Lucky Dube, who once sang in a song titled, “Shut up”. And if you can’t say something good about somebody, shut up. Don’t say those words that will hurt people. The things you say today will come and haunt you tomorrow. Do to others as you would like them do unto you.
1.2.4 The Use of Silence in Conversation.
Silence is a great tool for counsellors if used in the right way. It is also great when listening to friends. Just let people talk and listen to them and use your facial expressions and movements to acknowledge that you are listening. This can be a tough thing to do but extremely powerful for both you, as the listener, and the talker.
You will find that as you practise this, more people come to talk to you as you will be known as a listener.
Obviously there are times to speak during the conversation; however when you do so, make sure it is to paraphrase what the talker is saying or asking questions to get more information. Do not make it about yourself. When people want to know more about you they will ask you questions. This is the time to talk about yourself, but always make the listener part of the conversation. A good spiritual director or counsellor is one who listens more and speaks less.
1.2.5 The Use of Silence when the house is empty.
The silence of the home can be quite disturbing to some people as there is a natural need to fill the void of silence. We turn on the radio, play some music, call friends, or turn on the TV to fill this void. Having a completely silent home when you are alone does not mean you are alone; it simply means you are recharging your mind and giving it some downtime.
Silence helps us to work through, in our minds, the events of the day or project what we wish to execute during the day ahead. Such empty and quiet moments could be used to pray, write, or do some meaningful work on the computer. This is the time we are sometimes most inspired. It is harder when you are alone, however silent time can be used to think about the kind of life you want and work out ways to get it.
Silent people are always reflective.
Great books are written in such silent moments. Great works of art are executed in silence. Great researches and scientific breakthroughs are carried out in silence and much solitude. We owe a debt of gratitude to all men and women of different generations who through their discipline of silence, solitude and meditation unleashed their creative powers for the benefit of human kind. Silence is an indispensable handmaid of creativity. No practice seems of more value than silence. But learning to be alone and quiet requires great effort.
1.2.6 The Use of Silence in moments of danger and trouble.
In life, we come across moments of pains, suffering, crisis, sickness and trials of all sorts. At these critical moments we at times go blank, not knowing what to do. Sometimes we experience economic hardship, physical suffering, spiritual persecution, excruciating pain, deep sorrow and existential troubles. There is always this tendency in us to panic and tremble in fear, and to gasp and pant in the face of such moments of crisis, trials, troubles, challenges and temptations of life and to run around crying and announcing to everyone our problems.
Silence is one great and powerful remedy that one can employ in the face of trials and confusion. In prayerful and meditative silence we are able to go beyond human thinking and intervention. In silence we learn to trust and look up to God for help and deliverance and consequently, trust Him entirely with both our present and our future! In such moments of prayerful silence we learn to pray with the Psalmist: “I lift up my eyes to the mountains; where will my help come from? My help will from the LORD, who made heaven and earth”. (121:1-2).
In the face of danger, Moses admonished the Israelites not to be afraid; he assured them of God’s unfailing and protecting presence and urged them to remain silent and calm. He said to them: “… Don’t be afraid! Stand your grand, and you will see what the Lord will do to save you today” (Exodus14:13-14)
Isaiah also so beautifully puts it: “Those who wait on the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint.” (Isaiah40:31)
In the story of the calming of the storm in Luke 8:22-25, Jesus admonished his disciples not to be afraid. Fear is never a solution to any difficult situation. It rather compounds the situation. But in each trying moment silence enables us to hear the soft voice of God telling us that we are in His protective palms.
“Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour”. (1Peter 5:8).
Learn to use silence. It is a powerful tool in many contexts. It is good to be silent in the heat of anger (Prov. 14:17). It is also good to be silent if your words will convey a wrong impression, damage someone else’s reputation or offend a weaker person (Ρτον. 17:27; 16:27, 1 Cor 8:11). Be silent when you are tempted to joke about sin or make fun of holy things (Eccl 5:2). You should be silent if your words will damage a relationship (Prov. 16:28). It is better to be silent when you do not have all the facts, or when you have not verified the issue at stake (Prov. 18:13). The best option is to be silent if you would be ashamed of your words later (Prov.8:8). Finally, is better to keep silent if the issue is none of your business (Prov. 14:10). However, to be silent in some situation is not an act of foolishness; it is simply a display of divine wisdom.
